There are some mornings where the only answers to what happened last night exist through your phone (if you still have it). If the hangover symptoms and spiral of regret weren’t punishment enough, sometimes the text messages and blurry photos can make you realize that you’ve got some serious damage control to do. Drinking and texting are a prime cocktail of bad decisions, but receiving them soberly is a different story entirely.
Whether it’s texts that were sent in an intoxicated state or morning recaps from a sober pal, these are some of the funniest drunk texts that people have ever sent.
Alcohol and regret may have long gone hand in hand, but throw a cell phone into the mix, and you’ve got yourself a whole new ball game of dishonor.
1. You’d think that having your crush not be present during a night of debauchery would be a blessing, but when you have their number, all it takes is a few taps of the keyboard for it to become an instant curse. Unfortunately, you only realize that you’re not the Romeo you thought you were until the morning after pouring a few drinks down the hatch.
2. If you’ve managed to achieve having “Drunk” as a predecessor to your name then you’ve probably had your fair share of regretful morning-after texts. Drunk Patty may not ever know how she acquired a chip clip for an earring, but by the sounds of it, that’s probably going to be the least of her worries.
3. Better to be safe than sorry, right? Can’t imagine any cab driver being too pleased to arrive at a location and be instructed that the destination is also that location. However, chances are, this host probably saved some time for another drunken soul or maybe they were treated to a scenic route around the block.
4. Grabbing something to eat after a night of drinking may seem like the responsible thing to do before submitting yourself to the hangover gods, but public interactions don’t always go so swimmingly. Considering that this person was dressed as a wolf and urinated in chow mein, you have to admit that their initial attempt at a text message is more grammatically sound than one would imagine.