It’s pretty important to have a conversation with your partner and family prior to giving birth about who you want in the delivery room. It’s probably one of the only things that you are able to have control over. For a lot of people, who you want around is a big deal.
Loved ones should respect your wishes during such a vulnerable time. That’s why when one woman found out that while she was getting stitched up from a C-section, her mother-in-law not only was in the operating ward, but she held her newborn BEFORE she even got the chance to.
You can image how annoyed and angry this new mom was at both her mother-in-law and her husband. Before the birth of her daughter, the woman told her husband that she didn’t want any family at the hospital because she wanted a few hours alone as a new family before any visitors arrived.
But his mom was a doctor and after hearing the news of an unexpected operation, her husband called his mom for support. The MIL (mother-in-law) grabbed her hospital badge and let herself into the ward during the C-section. The anonymous mom explained on Mumsnet, “I wasn’t asked if it was okay if she could be there, and because I was being stitched up still, she held my dear daughter before I even got to.” The internet was just as ticked off with this woman’s MIL as she was.
One person wrote, “I’m so sorry. What a wanker that woman is. You are completely justified in feeling violated and angry. You’re also justified in feeling unsupported and let down by DH.” In fact, many agreed that this MIL crossed her boundaries and aren’t surprised that this mom is still angry six weeks later.
Another person commented, writing: “That’s horrendous. Being let down by your partner/medics during childbirth is not something that just gets better though…” There were those who didn’t think it was all the MIL’s fault and some blame should definitely be placed on the woman’s husband.
Many suggested that this woman needs to sit her husband down and have a chat with him about what happened and how it affected this woman and her whole experience of the birth of her child. One person wrote, “You aren’t being unreasonable if you sit your DH down and have a chat with him about it and explain how you feel. He was probably a bit oblivious, what with the birth being traumatic and him needing a bit of support.”
This woman explained to the internet that she wasn’t so shocked that her MIL did this. The woman pointed out that she is very much “a dominating and controlling woman” and even though she means well, she uses her status as a doctor as giving her the right to do what she feels, when she feels like doing it.
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